Tag Archives: love yourself

7 Sacred Flames: Independence From A Life Filled With Struggle

sparklerI used to bumble around in my life, trying to figure things out on my own and wondered why I was a big hot mess. Experiencing one huge struggle after the next, I spent most days feeling out of control. I was deeply influenced by others’ opinions of me. So eager to please, I accepted crumbs from all of my relationships. I hated myself and kept turning to others to give me the love that I wasn’t even willing to give myself.

Today is 4th of July, a U.S. holiday that represents independence. In those days, however, I felt anything but independent or free. In fact, I was in my own jail. Very dependent on others for constant direction and support, my core foundation was weak and easily crumbled at any harsh judgment or unkind word. I believed that my happiness was in the hands of others. It didn’t take much for me to be taken off course by the people and events around me. I even considered suicide, hoping to end the tortuous struggle that was my life.

Then, I found a book that saved my sanity and my life called Lazaris, The Sacred Journey: You And Your Higher Self, published in 1987. This book launched me into self-discovery. There was a particular section in the book that I read over and over. It talked about how we are never alone and that there is a Source energy that is nothing but Love. Because I spent much of my life feeling lonely, reading this was a huge comfort. By invoking this Source-Love energy, I eventually came to realize that life is not just about having things and surviving; it is about having a profound relationship with me and my Highest Self, which in turn, keeps me tuned in to Source.

My personal exploration led me to a daily practice of calling in the Love energies (also known as the 7 Sacred Flames), which completely transformed my life. As a result, I fell in love with me. Once I declared authentic love for myself, it wasn’t long before I met and married my soul mate and had 2 wonderful children. Today, I am also blessed with health and vitality and have a dream career. Now, everyday is Independence Day, filled with freedom and joy.

As a psychotherapist and relationship expert, I have certainly seen my share of people craving freedom from their struggles. Therefore, wanting you to be independent from constant fear, confusion and upset, I created an eBook packed with valuable information about the very same Source-Love energies that lifted me out of my own struggles.


7 Sacred Flames To Transform Your Life: Your Daily Roadmap To Anything You Desire

This eBook will launch July 15th, but you can have it FREE by registering your email in this link

You, too, will make everyday Independence Day! Now, that’s worth celebrating!!

Stay tuned for next week’s blog where I share more exciting information about how the Flames will help you become ‘Lucky In Love’.


3 Secrets To Honoring The Struggle

Today’s guest blogger, Jennifer Urezzio shares her wisdom in dealing with your own personal struggles by looking into your soul to change your perspective. I hope you find it as enlightening as I have. Enjoy!


– Tamara

3 Secrets To Honoring The Struggle

Jen u

I don’t know about you, but sometimes, the struggle is so unbearable that I don’t want to be in it…I want it gone and gone NOW! Isn’t it true that we judge our struggles because it might seem, in comparison to others, no big deal? Yet, when you’re in the thick of it, it sure feels like a big deal.

Reluctance in honoring your struggle and unwillingness to seeing the blessings in your situation actually creates more discomfort, upset and pain. And if that’s not bad enough, this energy gets stuck in your body and generates even more chaos in your life. For example, this often happens with not accepting and honoring the grief process because one becomes afraid of feeling and honoring their pain. The energy of this pain then gets stuck in the lungs, which can cause respiratory issues.

Honestly, its tough to embrace the difficult times, but when you do, it really does turn your struggles into blessings.

Jennifer’s 3 Secrets To Honoring The Struggle:
  1. Ask to be shown the blessings in this situation. It may be a challenge, but it certainly helps to make a declaration. Here’s a statement I suggest making; I honor this struggle and experience the blessings in this situation!
  1. Have a conversation with your Soul. Talk to your soul by holding your hand over your heart with the intention to speak to your central self – that part of you that has never been hurt and knows no fear. You can start with the simple question; What do I need to understand about this situation to honor myself and to heal?
  1. Remind yourself that the Divine has your back. This very practical advice (although it might not feel practical) is about you feeling the comfort of the Divine and knowing that the Divine has your back. You can do this by asking to feel the sensation of being loved and protected by the Divine (note: your mind is going to try and veto this, but just allow your body and the Divine to take over). If you have difficulty in doing this, then get help by a spiritual practitioner, like myself. I suggest you connect to this feeling a couple times a day during periods of struggle.

Thank you Jennifer for your words of wisdom. Its wonderful to know that we are not alone in our pain and struggles and that we can turn to our own heart for connection and comfort.

Jennifer Urezzio is a master intuitive and the founder and spiritual director of Know Soul’s Language. Soul Language is a way to consciously connect with your Soul that was received through Divine Guidance. Understanding your Soul Languages allows you to access your own Soul’s guidance to accept your value, be more confident, have more impact and grow into a stronger leader.




{Guest Blogspot} Remaining in Love with Yourself

Hi Loves! This week’s blog is a beautiful and poignant piece written by my dear friend, Kristen Darcy.  How many of you ignore the relationship you have with yourself throughout the years?  Read her 50 years of wisdom and learn how to nurture the most important relationship of your life – with YOU!

This blog is especially dear to me as well because it goes in line with my FREE 21 Days to Self Love Meditation Experience coming up on October 8. Check it out and don’t forget to register for this completely free event. Check out the video below Kristen’s blog. Enjoy!



bigstock-Buddha-hands-holding-flower-47788762“Each decade is different.” These were my mother’s words of wisdom when I turned a certain age and sharing my sense of discomforts about life and myself.  “Each decade is different” may not seem like too radical of an insight, but I use these words whenever I sense I am falling out of love with myself during a transformative period.

I now have five decades of life experience under my belt. My life has been filled with twists and turns that mostly fell into the “not as I had planned” category. I have gained a sense of comfort, however, in knowing that change is always certain. This knowledge brings clarity and a basic understanding of one profound belief: my mom was correct when she said each decade is different.

Being in the flow of the wave of creation is crucial, regardless of whether your intent is to paint your room a new color, get a new job or expand your family or begin anew. A foundation of self-love will move the journey forward with grace.

Falling out of love with yourself usually begins with the feeling that you’re not good enough and that is why life is working against you. Your mind (ego) grabs hold of that emotion and then you begin to obsess about it. Before you know it, you begin to believe you are a failure — unlovable, damaged, unsupportive, sad, depressed, angry, hopeless and infertile.

The emotion(s) take on an identity of their own and then BAM!  You start living those beliefs and lose all loving feelings for yourself.

I am always astounded by the complexity of the creation process, but especially so when I share with my children, who are now 16 and 11, all the “steps” that had to go right to create them. Remembering this reminds me that although the stars and moon had to align, to manifest a human into form, the creative wave is always flowing and as long as your are clear about loving yourself and your intention, the process is miraculously simple.

Most of us are inundated with a constant flow of messages via instant communication tools that also come with the expectation of instant gratification, Do you find yourself annoyed if you don’t get an immediate response to your text? But is this also our expectation about creating our hearts desire or living our dreams?   Do we feel it needs to happen in an instant; otherwise, there is something wrong with us?  This makes loving creating challenges even more intense.

It takes practice to keep your heart and mind on the same open line of communication.  This practice includes feeling and witnessing your emotions and allowing them to glide over you. Try setting up a daily practice of connecting to your childlike awe.  It is simpler than you think to cultivate a practice of being in the flow of emotional health and bringing nonjudgmental awareness to your feelings.

Your internal conversation might sound like this:

“What is wrong with me? Why can’t I have______?  Why is this happening to me?  Everyone else is___________!” 

When these types of judging thoughts roll in, pause and reflect and begin by asking yourself:  Oh boy, is this a loving thought? 

Then follow that question with these:

“How do I feel? What do I need?”  

Listen to your heart, acknowledge your chattering mind, and if the chattering mind talks over your heart, simply let it blow by.

You are not your feelings!   Living in a loving essence is accepting the feeling in the moment, acknowledging it and then acting on what you need by listening to your feelings!

Be in loving-kindness with yourself first and that love will ripple into all parts of your life and be the driver of your creations.

Love is our truth.  Remember this throughout each decade of your life!

KristenIntactHeadshotFinallogo_0831-38-RecoveredKristen Darcy, is a noted author, coach, motivational speaker and expert on the emotional aspects of infertility and other life challenges.  She presents at conferences around the country as an expert and keynote speaker.  She also consults with fertility clinics and providers to provide emotional support services for their clients/patients.

Kristen is the author of Girlfriend to Girlfriend: A Fertility Companion (First Books Library, 2000) and the award-winning Love & Infertility: Survival Strategies for Balancing Infertility, Marriage and Life (LifeLine Press, 2004). Love and Infertility is the recipient of the Hope Award, Best Book, Coping, from RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association.  She has been highlighted in national publications and broadcast media including NBC’s The Today Show, Woman’s World magazine, PBS’ Health Week and The Boston Globe. She also is a former board member and volunteer for RESOLVE of New England. Kristen’s next book coming out spring of 2015 Divorcing Intact:  How to Protect, Advocate, Guide and Empower Yourself and Your Children through a High-conflict Divorce. 

Visit her at kristendarcy.net.

Introducing Tamara’s FREE 21 Day to Self Love Meditation Experience: